Realizing Compassion

Realizing Compassion

Mother Theresa is the person who, I believe, is the personification of compassion. I admire her and what she did. Loving unconditionally takes a special understanding of who people are at the soul’s level. Serving selflessly takes knowing ourselves on that same deep level.

Daily life makes me grumpy and feel wasted. As the day goes on, managing the family makes me frustrated and I lose site of the bigger picture. I start micro-managing every detail of everyone’s life.  The reality is that these people are the ones I love and have committed myself to care for.They are special and alive and a miracle of actuality, I need to be more understanding. Being a caretaker is my miracle.

My goal today is easy, I need to cultivate compassion… make it grow from all the dark hiding places, one little moment at a time.  Remembering to be a little more kind when frustration tries to make me snappy.  It’s a seed I want to plant for myself and my kids. I truly believe that what people shine forth effects those around them and it creates a ripple effect. I want to see more compassion in the world so I need to be more compassionate.  It seems so simple when I say it. I just need to remember to do it, that’s the hard part.

Peace, Love, Hope, Joy



Today I Choose Happiness

Today I Choose Happiness

Good morning! It’s one of those fall days where you can hear the rain patter onto the leaves outside and you just want the fireplace warming your cold body. No plans, no worries, just the warmth wrapped around you like a hug.

I live in Kansas City and the leaves here are in perfect form. Every tree is full of color, it’s a late fall this year so we still have lot’s of beauty to look at through the window while we stay inside warmed and cozy.

I am in charge of how I feel and today I choose happiness.

Lately with all the colds going around and a stiff back because of the weather I have been less than excited to wake up in the morning and face the day. Sometimes life is just too overwhelming to be excited about it.  I was an only child growing so having all the people around me in the house is hard sometimes. Crawling under the covers is so much more comforting than the care and feeding of a bunch of free spirited children.

Because of this gloomy attitude I decided to start this blog and learn to free myself from my resistance. Maybe just stating the obvious is enough to get me going until the coffee kicks in!  I choose to be happy today. It is my choice after all. We forget, at least I do, daily, hourly, that I can change my own attitude.

Today I am going be grateful and look at the good, choose to be happy. Be warm and cozy and stay positive.

Of course it’s all so easy to say until the first kid throws up…

Have a HAPPY day if you want to!

Peace, Love, Hope, Joy


Go With the Flow

Go With the Flow

So I got distracted yesterday and didn’t get a chance to start work on my art assignment about my Mantra.  Five of the littlest kids starting throwing up with a fever and my dog wont eat or drink, can dogs catch human sickness?  Maybe today I will squeeze in some time, let’s hope.

I ended up working on a cute little panda drawing that I started earlier this week. I don’t usually do cutesy drawings but little animals make me smile so I am stretching my scope of abilities. He is turning out pretty sweet so far. He’s mixed media with graphite pencil, micron pens, neocolor watercolor crayons, and pastel pencils.  I think I will add some background color with pastel pencils and do some detail work today but other wise I am not going to spend too much more time with him.  I don’t have a plan so we will see what turns up, that’s part of the fun.

I believe that making art is a meditation.   It’s a gift spending the time working and using my senses, without thinking or planning ahead, letting things develop organically.  Even though I didn’t start my Mantra Art yesterday, I still thought about what I wrote and I realized my goal of being more connected to the present moment even with life’s little disasters occurring all around me. By letting life flow and accepting what I could do and could not do with grace, I was able to feel peace in my heart.

Baby panda guy is page 4 of a mixed media art journal that I started for myself to practice new techniques.

artjournal page 1 artjournal page 2 and 3 artjournal page 4

I have never done any art like these projects before.  It’s a mixed media adventure!

Today I want my meditation to be about Going With the Flow.  I will remind myself throughout the day to just be like the river and let life go where it needs, sick kids and all.

Peace, Love, Hope, Joy


I Am Home, An Art Assignment

I Am Home, An Art Assignment

“The past no longer exists, and the future is not yet here.” ~The Buddha

“The only moment in which you can be truly alive is the present moment. The present moment is the destination,the point to arrive at. Every time you breathe in and take a step, you arrive.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh 

My meditation this morning is about being present, living in the Now. It is so hard to remember this. I can find my place, slide into the moment and stay in bliss for a while but it fades as I forget and the day to day drama consumes me.  I know this is one of the main things I need to learn to be able to live a happy life.

In the book, You Are Here: Discovering the Magic of the Present Moment by Thich Nhat Hanh, I found this poem, or mantra, that I use to ground myself and reorient my observation into what is going on around me rather than what I am thinking and planning.

“I have arrived, I am home,

In the here and in the now.

I am solid, I am free,

In the ultimate I dwell.”

It’s a simple mantra, but powerful.  I have associated each phrase with a mental image and feeling.  No matter what I am doing I can repeat these words and slide into “Observer Mode.”  I use this during my meditation time, when I fit it in, and it is a practice, a training, so that it becomes powerful and useful during the rest of my day.

I am assigning myself an art project this morning: Make a piece of art that represents this mantra.  I want to hang this in a special place in my home so that when I see it I am reminded to “arrive back home.”  Be in the present, stop the thoughts and words and worries.  Just enjoy what the present moment has to offer instead of wishing it away with meaningless brain chatter.

Happy Life Experiment

Happy Life Experiment

Hello, I am Kate 🙂 Welcome to my journey. I am sick and tired of feeling hopeless and lost. After years of amateur study in most of the main religions and philosophy of the the world and I lot of amateur study in science and physics, I still don’t feel like I have the mental stability, the happiness, I know I should have on a daily basis.

This experiment I am starting is going to be my journey into what it really takes for me to be happy and stable every day of my life. I am not a writer so I apologize up front for not being perfect in my grammar or spelling. I can’t let the details stop me from starting.

A little about me…. I am 41, a wife and  mother. Mostly I would describe myself as an artist because that is one of my passions in life. I spend hours each day working on various art projects. One thing that makes my life unique is that I am the mother to 13 children, yes really.  Only 9 are still at home but still… I need to find my peace and happiness so I can be a good mom to these loud, screaming, precious angles.

From an early age I knew what it meant to be stressed out. I suffer from an anxiety disorder and have some personality disorders thrown in for fun.  It all just means that I am afraid of a lot of stuff most people take for granted. I’m like the little dog that gets his toe accidentally stepped on and wont ever come near you again.  My brain is a little over protective and I always, always have my escape planned out of any situation.  I am also a little ADD so sticking with things is hard.  I usually have 5 or 6 projects going on at once so I always have something new that I can focus on without getting board.  When I am sick or on stress overload I start to feel depressed and that is when I want to have skills in place so I can pull myself back up and be okay without making those around me suffer… or… *aka* I can be a real b**ch!

In my mind I have a picture of what a happy life looks like but I am certain that when I figure this sh*t out it won’t look the same, it never does.  My goal is to work through various art projects and find my way on the path.  I want to use my art as a reminder of the lesson I learn while making that piece. I need visual triggers all around me to remind myself of how I want to be.  I think after a while my ideas will become part of me. I want explore mental health, physical health and spiritual health… I know they are all part of the same circle, each one effecting the others.

Let’s get this thing going and see where it leads.

Peace, Love, Hope, Joy,

Kate 🙂

I think this video is a great introduction to my blog.  We are all made of the same energy, it flows through the universe and gives us consciousness.  The answers to all of our questions can be found by exploring the interconnection of everything.